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I would like to start a Topic, to place all of my Jokes!

I have Friends, who send me 'Funnies', that I would like to share with you all. Also, I have found Jokes around the Internet. So I thought, lets put them here.

If you are of a sensitive disposition, do not read! It is not my intention, to offend!

I would like to start a Topic, to place all of my Jokes!

I have Friends, who send me 'Funnies', that I would like to share with you all. Also, I have found Jokes around the Internet. So I thought, lets put them here.

If you are of a sensitive disposition, do not read! It is not my intention, to offend!

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The new American Marine Captain was assigned to an Regiment in a remote post in the Desert. During his first inspection, he noticed a Camel hitched up behind the Mess Tent. He asks the Sergeant why the camel is kept there.

"Well, Sir," is the nervous reply, "As you know, there are 250 Men here and no Women. And Sir, sometimes the Men have...m-m-m.... urges. That's why we have the Camel, sir."

The American Captain says, "I can't say that I condone this, but I understand about urges, so the Camel can stay."

About a Month later, the Captain starts having a real problem with his own urges. Crazy with passion, he asks the Sergeant to bring the Camel to his tent. Putting a stool behind the camel, the Captain stands on it, pulls down his pants, and has wild, insane Sex with the Camel.

When he is done, he asks the Sergeant, "Is that how the men do it?"

"Uh, no Sir," the Sergeant replies. "They usually just ride the Camel into Town where the Girls are."

The new American Marine Captain was assigned to an Regiment in a remote post in the Desert. During his first inspection, he noticed a Camel hitched up behind the Mess Tent. He asks the Sergeant why the camel is kept there.

"Well, Sir," is the nervous reply, "As you know, there are 250 Men here and no Women. And Sir, sometimes the Men have...m-m-m.... urges. That's why we have the Camel, sir."

The American Captain says, "I can't say that I condone this, but I understand about urges, so the Camel can stay."

About a Month later, the Captain starts having a real problem with his own urges. Crazy with passion, he asks the Sergeant to bring the Camel to his tent. Putting a stool behind the camel, the Captain stands on it, pulls down his pants, and has wild, insane Sex with the Camel.

When he is done, he asks the Sergeant, "Is that how the men do it?"

"Uh, no Sir," the Sergeant replies. "They usually just ride the Camel into Town where the Girls are."

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A little old Asian Lady goes to the Doctor in China, and says, "Doctor I have this problem with Gas, but it doesn't bother me too much... my Farts never smell, and they're always quiet. But I've been doing it very often."

The Doctor asks her to explain more, and the old Lady says, "In fact, I've Farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You probably didn't know I was Farting because they don't smell and they're silent."

The Doctor says, "I see, take these Pills and come back to see me next Week. "The next Week the lady comes back.

"Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the heck you gave me, but now my Farts...although still silent...stink terribly."

The doctor says, "Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your Sinuses, let's work on your hearing."

A little old Asian Lady goes to the Doctor in China, and says, "Doctor I have this problem with Gas, but it doesn't bother me too much... my Farts never smell, and they're always quiet. But I've been doing it very often."

The Doctor asks her to explain more, and the old Lady says, "In fact, I've Farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You probably didn't know I was Farting because they don't smell and they're silent."

The Doctor says, "I see, take these Pills and come back to see me next Week. "The next Week the lady comes back.

"Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the heck you gave me, but now my Farts...although still silent...stink terribly."

The doctor says, "Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your Sinuses, let's work on your hearing."

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Hehaheha.........Reallyfunny.

Hehaheha.........Reallyfunny.

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I like this idea we should name your corner something like Andrews alley or something better. Any ideas? :P

I like this idea we should name your corner something like Andrews alley or something better. Any ideas? :P

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hahaha cool jokes...

hahaha cool jokes...

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LOL, love your idea Andrew :) Keep going!!!!!

LOL, love your idea Andrew :) Keep going!!!!!

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Here is one for your joke corner Andrew.
Tarzan the Tree Hugger

Tarzan had been living alone in his jungle kingdom for 30 years with only apes for company, and suitably shaped holes in trees for sex.
Jane, a reporter, came to Africa in search of this legendary figure. Deep in the wilds she came to a clearing and discovered Tarzan vigorously thrusting into a jungle oak.
She watched in awe for a while. Finally, overcome by this display of animal passion Jane came out into the open and offered herself to him.
As she reclined on the wild grass Tarzan ran up to her and gave her a big kick in the crotch.
In pain she screamed "What the hell did you do that for?"
Tarzan replied, "Always check for squirrels."

Here is one for your joke corner Andrew.
Tarzan the Tree Hugger

Tarzan had been living alone in his jungle kingdom for 30 years with only apes for company, and suitably shaped holes in trees for sex.
Jane, a reporter, came to Africa in search of this legendary figure. Deep in the wilds she came to a clearing and discovered Tarzan vigorously thrusting into a jungle oak.
She watched in awe for a while. Finally, overcome by this display of animal passion Jane came out into the open and offered herself to him.
As she reclined on the wild grass Tarzan ran up to her and gave her a big kick in the crotch.
In pain she screamed "What the hell did you do that for?"
Tarzan replied, "Always check for squirrels."

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Three Kids come down to the Kitchen and sit around the Breakfast Table.

The Mother asks the oldest Boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some fuckin’ French Toast," he says. The Mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs.

She asks the middle Child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin’ French Toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away.

Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for Breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the fuckin’ French Toast."

Three Kids come down to the Kitchen and sit around the Breakfast Table.

The Mother asks the oldest Boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some fuckin’ French Toast," he says. The Mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs.

She asks the middle Child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin’ French Toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away.

Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for Breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the fuckin’ French Toast."

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Good one, Mary! :-)

Good one, Mary! :-)

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